Online Dating Guide

Part 1

For those who aren't exactly experienced with meeting and dating new women, online dating is great.  You can send messages and talk to attractive women from the comfort of your own home.  You can sit in front of your computer in your boxers with Cheeto dust in your fingers and still get phone numbers.

Well it's not exactly that easy, but once you get down the messaging routine to meet women online, meeting new women won't seem as daunting... as long as you have great pictures.

As you will soon find out, your pictures are absolutely the most important aspect of online dating.  Girls (and guys) are practically window shopping from a massive selection of people searching someone attractive that at least meets their standards. Even if you have the most fitting personality for her, it wont matter if she's not attracted to you.

We will go over in every step of the way, how you can: create the right profile, get sexy pictures, send the right messages, and set up dates.

It can be tough when you're a young (or an older) guy looking to meet new women without much experience. Fortunately, online dating can be a great option for the overly nervous guys and those who prefer not to rely on the club/bar scene.

2 Most Important Factors

I’m going to start off with the two absolute biggest factors with succeeding with online dating. They are:

  1. Your Pictures 

  2. Hitting the Numbers 

These two factors are likely the result of around 90% of your results online.  If you have great pictures and can play the numbers game, you’re pretty much guaranteed to meet new women unless you say something stupid in your profile or messages.
The competition online is fierce and you generally need to look better than the next guy. Fortunately, a lot of guys online are clueless of what they’re doing. If you were to create a profile with a girl that’s 7 out of 10, you’ll get bombarded non-stop with messages from guys – from needy paragraphs, spewing compliments, and/or aggressive and sexual comments (which now usually get banned).

When you send out a bunch of openers, they will either be:

1. Never Seen – It’s sent to a profile where the girl doesn't use it anymore
2. Gone to a fake profile – Small percentage but does happen
3. Blocked from Restrictions – sexual messages or sent too many of them
4. Seen but not open – The girl judges your thumbnail and decides to not bother open it.
5. Opened but not replied – Looked at your profile and didn't like it enough…. Or thought you are not the type she’s looking for
6. Opened and replied but not serious – The girl just wants someone to talk to. Likes to have orbiters (guys in her friends zone/texting buddies)
7. Opened, replied, and interested – This is obviously the one you want.

As you can tell, most messages sent to women won’t end up going anywhere. This is why only sending a few messages won’t cut it. Fortunately if you actually do play the numbers, there are plenty of women online who are very willing to reply and meet guys.

Respond Rates

There are some guys who have a 40%+ respond rate, but don’t get dates due to messaging with funny openers. They will say some “funny” joke or pickup line to get a response, then boast how many responses they get. These funny type messages will make you look like some Mr. Funny Man, not a cool dude. Those replies will likely not go anywhere or worse, you’ll become their texting buddy.

There is nothing wrong with using humor in your profile or when messaging women.  The problem is using too much or not the right type.  Give the image that you’re an attractive and cool guy that’s happens to be funny, instead of total clown that relies on his jokes for everything.  If you’re going to use humor, best to use it in a more of a playful and flirty type way.

Which Dating Sites To Use

My experience and success is with Plenty of Fish, OkCupid and Tinder. These sites/apps are the best to meet women.  This is due to:

  1. They're very popular, you can hit the numbers hard without running out of women
  2. Younger crowds, more girls that are your type; although depends on your age/preference
  3. Not too heavily focused on long-term relationships.  Most people on all dating sites are looking for relationships, but if you're younger you may not be as eager to settle down soon. Of course this comes down to what you're looking for

Phone Apps

Phone Reminders – Use the apps that create notifications, not alarms. Have them remind yourself for things like: spending time on the sites each day, texting/calling a girl, confirm a date, and even that you have a date later that day. It may seem unlikely that you'd forget but phone reminders (the one that stay on the top of your phone (android) are great for everything

POF/OKC Apps – This is near mandatory if you want to really succeed with online dating. If you only use your computer, you can’t reply back right away when a girl contacts you. Conversations that would have gone back and forth for days are now done in just minutes. Most girls will likely reply when you’re offline, be ready to reply back with the POF & OKC apps on your phone.

Tinder – I think you know why this is important. Just make sure your facebook has great pics.

Messaging Restrictions

25 Opener Maximum – POF has a limit on total openers you can send in one day. If you go over the 40, all openers will then become blocked for 48 hours

3 Identical Openers Maximum – POF has a limit on total identical openers you can send in one day. If you go over sending 3 identical openers, all openers will again become blocked for 48 hours. Women do definitely respond better to personalized messages, but just make sure you don't spend forever thinking up the perfect opener when most girls won't reply back

Sexual Talk – If you say anything sexual in your conversations or profile on POF, there’s a chance your account will become deleted.

Age Restriction – POF won’t allow messages to be sent to people 14 years younger or older than you.

As for restrictions on OkCupid, it’s hard to exactly tell since they’ve never released that information. A good idea is to follow the same basic guidelines as you do with POF.

Rejections & Dependence

I know there is going to be some of you who will have troubles accepting the fact that you need to get rejected a lot to be successful online.  Realise and accept that it’s going to happen. If you get upset every time a girl doesn’t respond to you, you won’t get anywhere.

I can go online right now and do a full blitz and easily get “rejected” by every girl I message.  But I know if I keep hitting the numbers hard the day after and the day after that – they’ll be some who won’t reject me and want to meet up. Try not to get phased by a bad day or two of blitzing. If you look good and are in a good location, girls will pull through. The crazy thing is how you never know how cool (or crappy) some of the girls online are that you met with. Who knows maybe that one girl you’re messaging could end up being apart of your life for a long time.

Pictures

Online dating thrives on your looks more than any other source for meeting women. You should confidently believe your pictures are the best that you’re capable of. Otherwise, they might just blend in with all the usual boring, lame, nice guy profiles out there.

Your attractive pictures as well as your profile should convey:

Cool - Relaxed, Chill, and Popular. This highly reflects on your clothing style in your pictures, as well as your text in your profile.

Fun No dull or boring pictures. Your fun side is necessary in this type of profile. This can be done a lot of different ways in pictures of you with your friends, at a party, at a concert, or anything like that.

Sexy/Your Looks You need to create attraction. This means your natural looks, but also includes your style, grooming, tan, etc.
~~If you can’t tell if your photo is sexy. Go to www.okcupid.com/mybestface to get it rated. Try and get at least an 8.

Power/Success (optional) - If you don’t feel like you can pull off a bit of the sexy type theme, a good alternative is power/success style like mentioned in the Sex Appeal chapter. This can be tricky to do but an example could be you in your business suit or driving your fancy car (if you have one). Women find the whole money and power look to be sexy. Best part is that it’s possible to pull it off even when you’re not the best looking guy on the block

Cover as many points of these as you can. If you can cover at least 3, you’ll be more attractive than 90% guys online.


This is my friend Steve I helped out with POF awhile back.  His profile is a good example what Sexy, Fun, and Cool pictures look like. When he was hitting the numbers hard, he had set up almost a dozen dates in one week.

Your potential with the quality of women you meet online is often at par or a bit below with your own looks. This means if you’re an 8/10 in looks, you’ll meet some 8’s and a lot of 7’s. That’s a big part of why your pictures are so important. It is possible to get girls in a higher “league” than you, but it doesn't happen often enough to expect it regularly.

If you're a pretty cool guy whose at least somewhat attractive, you'll do better being able to talk to girls out in person rather than online. Of course that can be very nerve-racking at first, so that's why it's a good start to have your first dates through online dating.