Texting Times After the First Date: How Long Do People Wait?


If you've recently been on a date, you're probably wondering when to expect the other person to text you.

We surveyed hundreds of men and women and tallied their responses below.

Along with gender, we also totaled responses by age. This helps provide you an expectation that's more realistic depending on how old you are.

Lastly, we also asked whether they expect men to text first after the first date.

By the end, you'll know exactly whether you should be holding out hope for a response or preparing to move on.

A pie graph displaying average texting times for men after the first date.

Texting Times for Guys After the First Date

Based on the chart above, most men like to text that same day. 

A total of 11.35% of men message within an hour of the date finishing.

That was a bit surprising. 

I assume it's guys just saying how they enjoyed their time.

92.27% text within 48 hours

If you're a girl waiting for a text (and it's been a couple days), odds are that he won't reach out. Still, it's worth messaging yourself.

I'm personally in the minority. While I can't remember the exact timeline I've used, I'm pretty sure I've waited 2+ days many times.

A pie graph displaying average texting times for women after the first date.

Texting Times for Girls After the First Date

Women wait nearly the same amount of time to text men after their date.

Most text that same day (with 9.84% within the hour).

If it's been a couple days, just reach out to them.

You have nothing to lose.

They could be waiting for you to do the same. I understand not wanting to seem desperate, but most people text quickly anyway.

If she likes you, the timing of your first text won't matter.

How Texing Times Differ by Age

Based on the table below, we can tell that the younger you are, the more likely you'll text sooner than later.

The largest difference is the category of waiting 2+ days:

Only 2.17% of those aged 18-27 wait 2 days or more to text (after the first date).

While 17.53% of those 43 or older text after 2+ days.

What about later that day?

Those aged 18-27 text later that day 57.61% of the time, while those who are 43+ only do it 22.68% of the time

Across all age groups, most prefer to text either "Later that day" or "The following day" after a first date.

After First Date Texting Times by Age

Age Group Within an Hour Later That Day The Following Day 2+ Days
18-27 16.3% 57.61% 23.91% 2.17%
28-32 12.94% 40% 41.18% 5.88%
33-42 10.28% 37.38% 45.79% 6.54%
43+ 4.12% 22.68% 55.67% 17.53%

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Are Men Expected to Text First?

We asked:

"Do you believe men are typically the ones to text first (after a first date)?"

  • 52% of women said yes.
  • 76% of men said yes.

So if you're a guy, she's not necessarily waiting for you to be the one to reach out. 

If you're a girl and haven't been messaged yet, there is a bit of a less chance he'll message you. He more likely believes he's supposed to text first.

Overall, the largest disparity was with males between the ages 18-27: 

88.37% of them believe men are typically the ones to text first. Those who were 43 or older said yes 61.70% of the time.

Age Group / Gender Yes (%) No (%)
Men: 18-27 88.37% 11.63%
Men: 28-32 80.95% 19.05%
Men: 33-42 74.14% 25.86%
Men: 43+ 61.70% 38.30%
Women: 18-27 51.02% 48.98%
Women: 28-32 46.51% 53.49%
Women: 33-42 57.14% 42.86%
Women: 43+ 52.00% 48.00%
Total for Men 76.29% 23.71%
Total for Women 51.81% 48.19%

The Verdict

As a whole, men and women wait to text around the same amount of time.

  • There is a 50% chance they'll text within the same day you went on the date.
  • The following day is still high at 42%
  • After 2 days is 5% and 3 days is 3%

Essentially, if they haven't already messaged you within 48 hours after the date, they're probably not going to.

However, they may be waiting for you to do the same. 

Therefore, you shouldn't wait too long for them to reach out. So, if you prefer not being the one to text first, don't go more than a couple days of waiting.

About the Study

  • We ran this survey asking 387 Americans how long they wait to text after the first date.
  • We also asked them if they believe men are typically the one to text first.
  • The survey has a 95% confidence rate with a 5% margin of error.
  • The average age was 36.7 years old.​
  • The study went from 10/28/23 to 10/29/23.

  • We used the platform Prolific
  • Responses were anonymous.
  • The survey was distributed evenly to male and female participants.
  • Ethnicity: 68.6% White, 10.2% Asain, 8.9% Black, 8.4% Mixed, 3.9% N/A
  • PDF Survey Download


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