Being genuinely nice isn't a deterrent to women by itself. It's great if you're a compassionate, good person with strong morals.
You should 100% own it if you are.
The only problem is that pushovers, losers, and the weak are generally "nice guys" as well.
To be a nice guy and still get the girl, you need to know:
The truth is that most guys can get laid (with legitimately hot women). You just need to understand what girls are actually attracted to.
Being a nice/good guy is irrelevant. What matters is the qualities that get you laid.
The bad boy types usually have them:
With outcome independence, it's about not being so reactive. You're responsible for your own behavior. Your happiness isn't dependent on any one outcome going your way.
This means you don't lash out (even if your girl is talking to another guy). If a woman needs to be dropped, you can recognize it and move on.
As for being better in bed- it's more from seeming better in bed than anything. It's about being a guy women would use for their spank bank. They don't have to be better in bed, but they probably are from having more experience.
After all, most women care about their body count. They don't want to waste increasing it on anyone.
You'll need to take and implement those 7 qualities the best you can.
Some changes can be done quickly (like improving your appearance). Others will need effort and time to get good at.
Fortunately, some can be faked (to a degree).
This requires you to recognize your emotions but not act on them. It can mean not double texting or blowing up her phone if she hasn't messaged in a while. Just ensure that logic influences your decision-making (and not your obsessive feelings).
Secondly, you should drop any overly romantic gestures:
You can value her time while still maintaining your own. You can tell her she's great without worshipping her.
Being a nice guy (who gets laid) actually has a unique benefit.
If you're familiar with screening, you'll know it's about filtering out types of women. If you only want a one-night stand, you flirt heavily to screen those who want a relationship.
But here's the thing...
Women screen men for the same reasons.
Sometimes they want a quick fling, other times they're interested in dating.
Thankfully, a "nice guy" (who hooks up a lot) can prevent it from happening.
It means they can attract a lot more women overall.
This is because they can come across as both a player and as boyfriend material.
It means you appear confident and experienced. She knows you're fun and likely great in the bedroom. At the same time, you're morally sound and not aggressive. She wouldn't be ashamed to show you to her parents.
This is mostly what I went for. It's like I might be trouble. While she doesn't prefer that I have a high body count, she likes how I give off "provider" vibes.
Just because a girl is with some cool, rebellious dude doesn't mean he's entirely good with women.
It's true that he's probably better than most. He gives off the right signals that girls like, and that helps him get more experience.
However, he's likely far from a complete package.
I know some guys who have girls falling at their feet. Yet once they start seeing someone, they act super needy and possessive.
Maturity and emotional intelligence aren't a given.
This is where you can surpass the typical "jerks" that women fall for. Your relationships can actually have longevity if you want them to.
There was a time when I was around 20 when everything just clicked for me.
I previously acted how I thought I "should" to get the girl. I didn't know what I was doing, so I just tried to imitate what others did.
Sadly there were two problems with that:
Not being yourself always ends up backfiring.
I was basically trying to "act cool" all the time.
On the surface level, there's nothing wrong with that. Everyone acts a bit differently with a girl versus their friends or parents.
The problem is when you act in a way you never have.
I filtered everything I said or did in a way I thought I had to.
This meant I could never be fully comfortable around women. Less comfort meant less confidence. This further caused nervousness to snowball.
Not everyone has a strong personality and character when they're 20. You will build it up as you go on more dates, get more experience, etc.
It was actually during a TV show I was watching called Californication.
It was fitting since I was probably watching it to emulate the protagonist who gets laid a lot (Hank Moody).
There was a scene in a bar where an attractive woman came up and asked Hank to dance.
He replied, "Hanky don't dance."
That simple line broke my simple brain.
In my mind, I thought someone who hooks up a lot just does those sorts of things. Even if I never really liked dancing, I thought it was something I should do. I interpreted not wanting to hit up clubs and dancefloors as me being scared...
I thought the ultimate version of myself would be smooth and able to do that kind of stuff. I believed I had to work towards being that person.
Dancing itself had very little to do with it...
I realized that being yourself is the best way to get the girl.
The show is obviously fictitious, but the statement holds true. While you should work on your shortcomings, you shouldn't try to be someone you're not.
It's a Chad mindset and one that can be pretty liberating. You know and implement what works (the 7 qualities) without being fake.