Should You Get a Girlfriend (or just play the field)?
Getting a girlfriend can be huge (especially if it's your first).
The experience is invaluable, and it's also just a ton of fun.
However, getting one just for the sake of it can backfire.
You may just like the idea of a girlfriend more than actually having one. This could lead to you falling easily for her and causing a mess of your emotions.
To figure this out, let's weigh the factors below (like your age, experience, what you want, etc.)
Whether to Get a Girlfriend or Not
If I had to pinpoint when I became a "man," it was during my first relationship.
I lost my virginity during it, and the whole experience felt genuinely awesome.
All sorts of new feelings arose and hormones were at their peak. Everything was new and exciting, including sex.
In the world of the infamous pickup scene, it's insane no one talks much about the value of your first relationship.
It provided me with baseline knowledge of interacting with women.
Everything from texting to escalating, to managing emotions and more was learned through it.
It gave me at least some confidence in knowing what to do.
If you haven't dated before, it's worth it to get a girlfriend.
However, you should be aware of oneitis before you get one. This can happen during crushes or first relationships (where you quickly get super attached).
Do your best to recognize when or if it happens. You'll know it if you feel like you're in love after the first week.
What if you already have dated before?
If you've already dated, getting experience is still critical.
However, the dynamic does change a bit...
This is since experience with hookups and playing the field can be more valuable than a regular relationship.
This is due to you developing an abundance mentality.
It happens when you've proven (to yourself) that you can meet new attractive women at any time.
It's typically best accomplished through online dating or cold approach.
It's a great skill to have, but it's essential when you date someone new.
This is because it helps you avoid being dependent on relationships for your happiness.
You choose to be with a girl because you genuinely like her. You don't stay because you fear loneliness or long dry-spells.
The relationships you have will be much better off (for both of you).
Why None of This May Matter
For most, it won't matter whether you should or shouldn't date someone.
What I mean by this is your actions are mostly predetermined.
Your feelings for a girl will ultimately call the shots.
Even if you try to "play the field," you'll (likely) end up falling for a girl early on. Your standards and experience need to increase before you get selective.
A man's dating life really follows a linear path. For better or worse, some guys get off that path early once they find someone.
You just need to get out there and start walking it. You can't skip ahead. Maturity and stability require effort and time to progress.
I don't mean you should get a "practice girlfriend" or anything. You just need the progress and growth to happen (with taking action).
In the end, it's worth getting a girlfriend if you can let it happen naturally. It likely won't work out if you try to rush into one.
Of course, there will always be some exceptions (like if you don't have the time). Yet even if you shouldn't get one, your emotions will still drive your decisions.
Don't Take Dating Too Seriously
That's easier said than done.
But if you're not at least 30, your relationships have a 90% odds of failing.
In addition if you're young, there's a strong chance she's not taking any relationship seriously.
She's here for a good time, not a long time.
If you get that vibe from her, it can be a plus (if you can handle casual dating).
Otherwise, just recognize the fleeting nature of dating her. Things could end up working out, but they probably won't.
It's actually a healthy mindset to have going in any relationship. You will better value your time with her, and not try to make it something that it's not.
