Stealth Attraction: Avoid This Useless PUA Technique

05/21/23

What is Stealth Attraction?

Stealth attraction is a method to discreetly gauge and build a woman's interest in you. It's based on regular stealth attraction of making small "escalations" with women to see if she likes you without getting rejected. 

The same replies through text, with assessing interest from her responses.

However, it's essentially just another childish PUA term. Yes, gauging interest from a girl is a good idea, but that's not some powerful technique- it's just a fundamental part of meeting women.

The other part of gradually (but overtly) building her interest isn't anything new, either. After all, anyone would continually build a connection with someone they continue to spend time with (through text or not).

Stealth Attraction Texting Examples:

  • The main (though obvious) way is to tell if she's attentive to you. Is she usually the one to text you first?
  • Another example could be saying, "We should go do x sometime."
    It's not a direct invitation, but it can help indicate interest. However, they could just be polite and agree without actually wanting to go out with you.

Stealth Attraction In-Person Examples:

  • In person it's just using the basic ability of assessing if she's receptive to you. If she's closed off or defensive, move on.
  • Building up interest in-person is pretty straightforward. There's nothing unique you should do other than having you both enjoy the time spent together.
    The only example of something to do is just to progressively flirt with her, and seeing if she enjoys it.
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Why You Shouldn't Use "Stealth Attraction"

There's a lot more to this "technique" than just some dating 101 principles. This is where it goes off the rails.

Here's what's wrong with the regular "stealth attraction":

  • Involves a lot of touching. Without clear, obvious signals, it is not worth doing any to a stranger.
  • It leads into the idea of psychological manipulation. This is clearly wrong for many reasons. Also, it's not like saying some special words in some unique way could ever change her interest in you.
  • It's filled with fluff. It suggests (in person) continually monitoring your body language, maintaining eye contact, squaring off to her, etc. The last thing you should do is go through a mental checklist instead of focusing on the conversation.

The good thing is you can't fully apply this "technique" to texting since you're not in person. What remains is just the basics of texting a girl, and it doesn't offer anything new.

As with every other seduction technique, the primary flaw is how it assumes women can be "gamed." 

As just mentioned- the intent to manipulate is bad enough, but the woman's interest in you will never be dictated by your pickup technique.

All in all, none of it's really worth the effort. It's similar to negging where it's just not worth the effort.

The worse part is that you may be perpetually friend-zoned by a girl. No reason to indefinitely spend time talking to a girl with the hopes of it leading to "something more" one day.

Stealth Attraction Alternatives

The best alternative to stealth attraction texting is not using any "technique" at all.

Understand the significance and value of texting, but realize there's no secret method.

That being said, there are some basic guidelines for what you should or shouldn't do:

  • Don't waste time texting someone if they've already turned you down.
  • Don't waste time thinking up the perfect response. The more time you invest talking to a girl, the more it will sting if/when she moves on.
  • Try to not go too long without suggesting to hang out.
  • Don't be dependent on the outcome. It's easier said than done if you lack experience.
Cartoon style image of a woman being stealth attraction texted on her phone.

Trivial Tactful Texting

While there is some use or truth to stealth attraction texting, it's on things you should already know (which is mainly common sense).

Use texting to build connection, have fun, and flirt- all while not taking it too seriously or wasting too much time.

Just try not to get caught up in this misleading advice or the belief that women suck.

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